NaPoWriMo Day 30

Final day. Final poem. I can't think of a title at the moment and my head hurts too much to keep trying.  Enjoy.


The cool porcelain cradles my body,
knees pulled tight to my chest
and nails digging into my arms.
The hot water provides protection,
keeps the demons away and hides my tears.

If I stay here,
maybe these feelings will get washed away..

If I just stay here,
maybe the world will go away.

NaPoWriMo Day 29

I woke up next to someone special this morning and after a year, it is still one of the most awesome feelings in the world. I felt good and it was inspiring which is where this poem came from.

Good Morning

Your body lays stretched out,
arms above your head with the sunlight
bursting through the windows.
And I watch your breaths, rise
then fall. I want to curl against you.
Lay my head on your chest and listen
to the sound of your heart beating.
It’s the lullaby that makes me feel safe.
Your arms wrap around my body
and I am home.

NaPoWriMo Day 28

Glowing Red

I set fire to the world and watched it burn.
The flames act without prejudice,
engulfing it all. The good, the bad,
the ugly and the beautiful.
Each crack and pop, every roar
of the blaze is a line in the song.
Make the pain sing
and rise from the ashes anew.

NaPoWriMo Day 27

Daydream

There is no acid on your fingertips
and no poison on your lips.
The distance is what hurts,
the sudden darkness in your eyes.
Words left unspoken, trapped by fear.
A perfect vision in my head:
you in my arms, resting easy.
A dream snuffed by reality.
And I wonder, do you see it too?

NaPoWriMo Day 26

While You Sleep

Waking in the middle of the night,
the light in the corner illuminates shadows.
I lay staring at them as they move slightly.
Stalking me, waiting for my eyes to close
so they can shake me awake again.
And you seem to sleep so soundly.
Your body slightly curled, holding everything in.
Heart protected and thoughts locked up.
My arm reaches out to hold you but freezes.
Drawing it back to my own body,
I go back to watching the shadows
and trying to keep them from touching us.

NaPoWriMo Day 25

Wishes

Reaching for lost breaths
and missing hearts. Digging
through midnight’s sky for escaped dreams.
The glowing time is my North star,
leading me into the darkness
and empty night. Steering me away from home.
Away from what I need and into broken



space.
Haunted by whispers and temptations.
My hands are extended, reaching
for something that keeps slipping between
and drifts even further.
You.

NaPoWriMo Day 24

Riding the Metro

Screaming into a speeding train,
the passengers are escaping with my yells.
Unknowingly, they ride along with the exhausted pain,
talking about one night stands, local sports teams
and workplace drama.

To them, I am just another color in the blur.
But I stand alone, separate from everything
trying to expel the excess.
The overflow of voices in my head
catch a ride on the metro.

NaPoWriMo Day 23

Midnight

Dancing in the past across the cobblestone.
Street lights twinkle and reflect in fountains.
The cool night kisses softly.
But she too will leave and break hearts.

NaPoWriMo Day 22

Out to Sea

Don’t get pulled under and drown in the waves
she said.

The water looks so beautiful,
sunlight dancing on the surface.
Breaking the light, I dive in.
Its coolness envelopes my body,
holding me tight, afraid to let go.
I let the tide take me away
from the shoreline littered
with tragedy and heartbreak.

NaPoWriMo Day 21

In Ruin

I want to destroy something beautiful.
Burn it and let the ashes drift away,
fall to the ground like snow.
Each piece is unique, unlike any other.
Delicate with blackened edges,
ready to fall apart at the slightest touch.

NaPoWriMo Day 20

Confession

You weren’t what I expected
but you might’ve been what I needed.
A simple kiss in the rain caught me
off guard and intoxicated my soul.
Under your spell, bewitched
by your dimples every time you smile.
My fingers feel at home on your body.
And I’m homesick when I see the distance
in your eyes.

NaPoWriMo Day 19

Haunted

Curled in a ball to keep my heart
from beating out of my chest.
To keep the darkness from swallowing it.

Still, my subconscious is invaded.
The demons creep and torture me.
Waking in a sweat, staring into nothing
wishing for an easier sleep.

NaPoWriMo Day 18

A Bookshop Love Affair

There was a fat white cat asleep in the corner.
Her snoring in tune with the slow, easy
sounds of blues filling the air.
I saw you staring hard at the rows of books.
Your hair fell across your shoulder,
fingers sliding along the spine
of Hemingway, Kafka, skipping Meyer, back on O’Connor, and Thompson.
Your hand gripped the side of the shelf
and your eyes fluttered shut.
I stood there watching as you inhaled deep.
The breath hanging in your chest,
holding the bookstore’s aroma inside.
A smile crept across your face,
lips stretched out pressing dimples into your cheeks.
Opening your eyes, you looked right at me:
“The smell of books on wooden shelves is intoxicating.”
Standing, paralyzed by your directness,
I just nodded. You glided over to me
then took my hand in yours.
And in the fiction section began our own story.

NaPoWriMo Day 17

Dreaming a Reality

“When I wake up, I have to remember all over again that my dreams are not real and that reality is not a dream.” - Cecelia Ahern

Running in the woods, the smell of wet bark
smacks me in the face and sticks to my skin.
The moon lurks between bare branches,
mocking me from afar.
My footsteps fall heavy,
pressing deeper into the earth.
Searching, desperately seeking
an exit door.
Anything out of this nightmare.
The stars catch my wrists.
A trap. Captured, paralyzed
and wide-eyed waiting for you.
Shake me, take me
from this place.

NaPoWriMo Day 16

Dorian

Staring at the waves breaking,
beautiful and calm crashing down.
The salty air kisses her skin
and stings the cuts.
Sand is cool and wet, thick
between her toes.
Alone with the reflection of the moon,
crystalline stars float on the water.
Her name meant “from the sea”
and she was ready to go home.

NaPoWriMo Day 15

Day 15, the halfway point. To commemorate, a crappy poem about being in the middle.

Purgatory

Halfway between coming
and going.
Floating in a pocket of the unknown.
The past weighs down heavily
and the future thrusts upwards.
Crushed between two extremes.
Love and hate.
Will and fear.
Mania and depression.
Each day is caught
in between.

NaPoWriMo Day 14

From the Start

Her story is told in the lies
she spills from her poisoned red lips.
Every movement is carefully planned,
choreographed for tragedy.
Disconnected


from the start
with a smile that says otherwise.
The moon is crimson at midnight,
a silent omen watching.
“I love you,”
but I’m already gone.

NaPoWriMo Day 13

Love is Deadly

I made the mistake of falling in love.
She was broken and beautiful.
Maybe I could fix her.  Or maybe
she could fix me.
But then I saw the devil
in her eyes through the smoke
coming off the barrel of her gun.

NaPoWriMo Day 12

Gone Away

I stare into my cup of tea, searching
for answers in the swirls of milk
and honey. My head gets lost,
drifting into different worlds.

A slow descent into madness,
it comes on fast and doesn’t let go.
A waking nightmare of voices
and visions. Sleep comes
without rest. The darkness is invaded.
Loaded with my haunted subconscious,
I feel misplaced
and hopeless.

NaPoWriMo Day 11

Here's today's poem:

Nightmares in a Dark Alley

The blades of the fan spin.
Gusts of air reach around my neck,
choking me like his five fingers.
The silence presses on me,
crushing me. My brain tries to move
my body but it lays paralyzed.
If I don’t move, if I lay under the blankets,
I can’t be hurt. No one can touch me.
But the silence, it is not calm.
The fan is loud, echoing in my ears.
Drafts encircling me, I can feel his breath
on my exposed skin. If I close
my eyes, his just glare at me in the darkness.
Gleaming with devilish desire.
I cannot escape him
until I am dead.

NaPoWriMo Day 10

Almost gave up on this again today.  But I didn't.

Searching for the Words

I sat down to write you a letter,
to tell you how I feel.
And I started to write it ten
different times.
The furthest I got was the greeting,
To my love,
You make me feel like I’m home.
Then my mind breaks.

I don’t know what to say after that.
Every word I pull and weave
with the next gets torn apart.
Nothing feels like it makes sense
and all I want is for you to understand.
To see how much I love you. And believe me.

I stayed awake for days, held prisoner
by my thoughts. And desperation
to get free.

To my love,
You make me feel like I’m home,
a home that isn’t completely broken.
The stars don’t feel so far away
and the night doesn’t feel so dark.
Your imperfections are beautiful.
There is no other way to say it except:
I love you.
Kisses always,
me

NaPoWriMo Day 9

Speechless

click click click
Fingers fly over the keyboard.
And then find the backspace button.
Erasing all the words I should’ve said.
All the words I need to say.
All the words I cannot say.

The strange characters I type,
don’t make sense to me.
Stuck with a million different voices.
I could search to the ends of the world
and still not find the right words.

NaPoWriMo Day 8

Today's poem actually was written using the prompt on napowrimo.net. Enjoy.

Spring Death

The sounds of spring are absent.
Silence lays stagnant in the air.
There are trees budding
but still some stand tall
and dead.
Showing nothing but bare branches,
they waver in the wind.
The sunshine cuts
through their limbs and blinds.

Distant chirping breaks the silence.
And is quickly choked giving life
back to the quiet.

NaPoWriMo Day 7

Lessons in Astronomy


I wish I could give you the world.
And the moon.


Those words she spoke to me,
her voice was gentle and cradled me.
I don't think she knows it
but she has given me the world.
And all the stars.


We hold the planets tight between our hands.
The Milky Way twists itself around our fingers.
Orion's Belt keeps your body pressed against mine.
Your kiss is filled with the heavens,
breathing magic into my lungs.

NaPoWriMo Day 6

Almost didn't do a poem for today. My mind hasn't been cooperating so this isn't my best work. And it's untitled.

Fractured reality at the bottom
of a glass. Her crimson lips
tasted of Hell.
And still she felt like home.
Sad notes of a saxophone
tangled with the smoke in the air.
She slid off the stool, kissed
my neck and whispered
“I need you.”

Before the sun came up,
she slipped out the door.
And my neck still burned
from the Devil’s kiss.

NaPoWriMo Day 5

Apology No. 330

Swimming in apologies,
drowning from insanity.
The struggle is seen with each tear.
To take all the pain and hurt
away is my greatest wish.
But there is no believing my words.

Chest is wrapped tight,
squeezed by disbelief.
My hand can’t unclench it
and help the breath come easier.
But it is still outstretched,
waiting.
Wanting.
Patient.

NaPoWriMo Day 4

I was almost ready to give up on NaPoWriMo today because I felt too exhausted halfway through the day and couldn't fathom writing a poem tonight.  But I did it.  I powered through my exhaustion and here is the result.


Let Go


Fireflies waltz and cut
through the air.
Trying to mimic the stars, they serenade
the midnight sky.
They think they are so brilliant
and lead the way of travelers home.

I trapped them in jars as a kid
and stared with contempt.
Imprisoned and helpless,
yet still illuminated their golden light.
Set free, they reunite with the crisp
winds of night.

Set free, I dance with their light
and dream of being among the stars.

NaPoWriMo Day 3

Here's my poem for day 3 of NaPoWriMo. It's a prose poem.


Death of an Innocent

I stepped into the shower.  The water was already streaming down.  I needed this.  The drain was open and waiting.  All my dirty secrets would be gone—out of sight and away.  But each drop was heavy.  Every sting was further pressing his fingerprints harder.  Deeper into my skin. The water wouldn’t turn off fast enough.  I collapsed to the bottom of the empty tub.  I couldn’t kill it.  I was so scared.  The hum of the fan was too loud.  I pressed my hands tight over my ears.  But his words were louder than before.  They had to be heard over the fan—shouting over the hum of the traffic.  Please, please, please no.  God save me.  Oh no he said.  Don’t call to God.  You are an abomination.  A sinner and unnatural.  He took out his bible, preaching to me in the alley.  One hand touching the pages, searching the word, the other searching my body.  I picked myself out of the tub and turned on the news.  A story about a country across the globe with weapons of mass destruction.  Don’t they know about what happened tonight?  The most powerful weapon of mass destruction was waved in my face.

NaPoWriMo Day 2

The prompt for day two of NaPoWriMo was to write a poem inspired by the #1 song from the day you were born.  I didn't write one inspired by it but I did take the title as a jumping point.  And here's the result:

Livin' on a Prayer

Swimming for answers
found in the light.
A reality fragmented by good feelings
and bad ones.
I scratched at my skin
to try and rid myself of the dark
and keep God in my veins.

I live for salvation offered
in 1 cc syringe.

NaPoWriMo Day 1

Happy April 1st. It's April Fool's Day but more importantly, it's the first day of NaPoWriMo.  I'm going to hopefully succeed in writing a poem every day for the entire month of April. I don't think that needs any further explanation so here's my first poem:

Forgiveness

Her face still lingers

in my waking dreams.

Words that escaped her cracked lips

vibrate in my head,

Liar.

Bitch.

We’re done.

Shaking my whole body awake,

I can still see the pain in her eyes.

Terror. But behind it all,

strength.