Daycare Worker's Prayer

Dear God,

Grant me the strength to get to work in the morning
And to keep a smile on my face even during diaper time.
Please provide me the ability to feed three babies their bottles at once while talking to a parent on the phone.
Thank you Lord for clogging my ears because the kids are extra cranky this week,
And for Xanax which keeps me calm outside on the playground with 50 kids running and screaming.
Oh Heavenly Father, shower me with your patience for those days when the children will not nap and jump on their cots.
And please don't give me lung cancer when I chain smoke on my break.
Oh Lord, give me a liver that can handle all the shots I take when I get home.
I ask you, oh mighty one, don't strike me down when I use your name in vain under my breath.
Keep my eyes open while the lights are out so I don't fall asleep to the sounds of classical music which floods the hallway.
And spare my back from aches and pains from lifting gluttonous children.
You are all knowing Father, send some of that knowledge to these children so they know not to rip things off the wall.
And grant me the intelligence to know that arguing with a three year-old is a losing battle.
Please Lord, let the supply of hair gel never dry on picture day,
And send a smile sailing across each of their faces.

I ask all this with an open heart full of love;
And in your holy name I pray,
Amen.